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The Witch’s Last Wishes: Why Are They All About Cuddling? | Chapter 39

The Emotionless Bastard

Chapter 39 – The Emotionless Bastard

 

So comfy~

 

Stepping out of the Game Hut, Lin Xi felt completely refreshed.

 

The Triple-A game Xia Xun had recommended was incredibly fun.

 

“Thanks, Xia Xun! Also, your gaming skills are amazing!”

 

Lin Xi had always been proud of the hand speed she’d developed over a decade as a shut-in, but Xia Xun had absolutely crushed her.

 

“To be this good even at video games… as expected of a ‘hexagon warrior,’ an all-rounder magical beauty girl!”

 

“Stop praising me so much~” Xia Xun covered her face, blushing at Lin Xi’s compliments. “I’m good at games because I enjoy them, but also because I can learn combat styles from them.”

 

“In the game, I control a character to fight monsters; in reality, I control my own body to fight them.”

 

That actually works? Lin Xi didn’t quite understand, but she was deeply impressed.

 

“No wonder you were so intense that I thought sparks were going to fly off the controller. You really were giving it your all.”

 

“Oh, stop it~” Xia Xun gave Lin Xi a playful nudge. “I wasn’t being that violent with the controller.”

 

Lin Xi took a long, satisfying stretch. Today was the happiest day she’d had since arriving in this world.

 

Happy times are always fleeting. After crossing the intersection, Lin Xi and Xia Xun parted ways to head to their respective homes.

 

“Lin Xi, can we hang out together again sometime?” It had been a long time since Xia Xun had enjoyed a day this much as well.

 

“Sure.” Lin Xi gave a light wave. “See ya.”

 

“Mhm, see you tomorrow!” Xia Xun turned and walked away with a light, brisk step.

 

See you tomorrow? Lin Xi paused. Oh, right. Tomorrow was Monday-the “doomsday” for students and office workers alike.

 

Even though they attended the same school, Xia Xun was in the Special Class. It wasn’t like they could just see each other whenever they wanted.

 

“Xia Xun definitely has tons of friends. She’s probably just being polite,” Lin Xi said with a bitter smile.

 

Xia Xun might forget this wonderful afternoon before long, but Lin Xi would remember it forever.

 

She’d had a great time playing with Xia Xun, but beyond that, all the accidental physical contact with her had given Lin Xi enough energy to survive for several more days!

 

Most importantly of all, there had been no interruptions from that heartless jerk Shi Yu. Perfect!

 

“Perverted Witch?!-“

 

Shi Yu’s cold, eerie voice suddenly rang out from behind her. Lin Xi jumped in fright.

 

“Don’t you know you can scare people to death like that?!”

 

Shi Yu hadn’t just been eavesdropping; she had been stalking them. 

 

While Lin Xi and Xia Xun were inside the Game Hut, Shi Yu had been at the Starbucks across the street, sipping coffee and waiting for them to come out.

 

“You’re a total loser-not just useless, but a coward too,” Shi Yu said, blunt as ever. “In our line of work, being a useless coward means you’re not far from kicking the bucket.”

 

“Hmph,” Lin Xi pouted. “It’s not like I joined ZERO voluntarily. The only reason I’ve fallen this low is because you coerced me!”

 

“Heh. We in ZERO are willing to take in a witch like you, but would Xia Xun? Would the Countermeasures Bureau?”

 

“Huh? Didn’t I turn off the headset and cut the connection? How did you know I asked Xia Xun if the Countermeasures Bureau would accept witches?”

 

“I guessed,” Shi Yu said, her lips curling into a smirk. “I knew for a fact you’d want to be a traitor and get recruited by them.”

 

“You’re a natural-born backstabber. But haha, they don’t want you.”

 

Lin Xi: “…”

 

Shi Yu’s guess was spot on, but her words infuriated Lin Xi.

 

Yet, Shi Yu continued with a tone of mock earnestness:

 

“Why are you always thinking about ‘leaving the darkness for the light’? Our ZERO is the side of light and justice.”

 

“Then why did ZERO recruit a villain like you?”

“I dare you to say that one more time.”

 

“Fine, I won’t!”

 

Shi Yu: “…”

 

“Anyway, our ZERO is definitely a righteous organization. In this chaotic world, we are like a lotus flower rising from the mud-pure and unsullied.”

 

“But,” Lin Xi said, “Xia Xun said that ZERO is a group of brain-damaged weirdos, new-age terrorists, and the primary targets they’re trying to capture.”

 

“Do you think Xia Xun is right?”

 

“She’s pretty spot on. Shi Yu, aren’t you exactly a brain-damaged weirdo terrorist? You’ve got the full stack of debuffs.”

 

“Perverted Witch, if you dare speak to me with such insolence again, I’ll teach you how to be a proper human being!”

 

“Fine, I won’t!” Lin Xi returned to the main topic. “I just joined ZERO and don’t know much about it, so I can’t judge who’s right between you and Xia Xun.”

 

To Lin Xi, ZERO was just a name.

 

Setting Shi Yu aside, Lin Xi felt that Lu Yi and Sister Lin were both very friendly.

 

As for that teammate she hadn’t met yet, Zheng Mo-she was a young lady from a wealthy family, so she surely had a good upbringing and couldn’t be a bad person.

 

In other words, is my bad impression of ZERO entirely Shi Yu’s fault?

 

It seems that’s the case… Lin Xi shot a resentful glance at Shi Yu.

 

“Regardless of how I view ZERO, I’m already one of its members.”

 

“I will use my own eyes to see, my own ears to hear, and my own mind to judge exactly what kind of organization ZERO is.”

 

“Mm,” Shi Yu nodded. “Those few sentences actually sounded like something a human would say.”

 

“I have one more question,” Lin Xi said. “I hope you can answer it seriously.”

 

“Fine, ask away.”

 

“Just like Xia Xun said, people have deep-seated prejudices against witches. But why aren’t you guys afraid? I’m a Special-Grade Disaster, after all. Why would you even let me join ZERO?”

 

“Hahaha!!!-” Shi Yu immediately clutched her stomach and burst into laughter.

 

Lin Xi was left stunned. What happened to the promised serious answer?

 

This silver-tongued bastard…

 

“Sorry,” Shi Yu said, restraining her laughter. “I’ve had professional training. Normally, I don’t laugh-unless I can’t help it.”

 

Cough, cough!-

 

Shi Yu cleared her throat and said seriously:

 

“It’s not that I have a low bar for humor; it’s that your question was too idiotic.”

 

“Afraid of you? With just your level of skill, you think you’re worthy of making ZERO afraid?”

 

While not being feared by others was a good thing, Shi Yu’s words really made Lin Xi’s fists itch.

 

Shi Yu continued, “ZERO fears nothing! We are as vast as the sea, accepting all rivers. Never mind a Special-Grade Disaster like you; even the highest-tier, most prestigious Super-Grade Disasters would be recruited without hesitation under the right circumstances!”

 

She’s just bragging without a script now, isn’t she? Lin Xi was half-skeptical. “If-and I’m just saying if-I actually became a threat to society-“

 

“That’s simple,” Shi Yu cut her off before she could finish. “I’d put a bullet through your head.”

 

“Wait, I’ve at least provided you with food and a place to stay. You’d have the heart to do that?”

 

“Why wouldn’t I?”

 

“You… you ungrateful white-eyed wolf!” Lin Xi seriously suspected that Shi Yu was a heartless bastard.

 

“Fine, fine,” Shi Yu said with a smile. “Your kindness can never be repaid, right?”

 

“If that situation really happens and I ‘don’t have the heart’ to pull the trigger, then I’ll let Lu Yi use a bomb to blow you up instead.”

 

Lin Xi: “…”

 

“Lu Yi wouldn’t be that cruel to me…”

 

Forget it, Lin Xi thought. How could she possibly fall into depravity and become an evil witch?

 

Rather than thinking about these pointless things, she might as well consider what to have for dinner.

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The Witch’s Last Wishes: Why Are They All About Cuddling?

The Witch’s Last Wishes: Why Are They All About Cuddling?

魔女小姐的遗愿,怎么都是贴贴
Status: Ongoing Type: Author: Released: 2025 Native Language: Chinese
Zhao Xinning has such long, fair legs; I want to cuddle with her. Miss Shi Yu has such big, watery eyes, and she smells so sweet; I want to cuddle with her. Lu Yi is a Neko[1], the ultimate dream of any Otaku[2]; I want to cuddle with her. Miss Xia Xun is a Magical Girl and the mortal enemy of us witches. That's just too exciting! Magical Girls are the best! I want to cuddle with her more than anything! ... After transmigrating into this parallel world, Lin Lu took over the body of a deceased witch. After browsing through Miss Witch's Last Wish List, Lin Lu was utterly speechless! Was she supposed to be the Blazing Blast Witch or the Cuddle Witch?! Ten last wishes, and every single one of them involved getting intimate with girls?! The kicker was that among these girls, there were Nekos, Vampire Princesses, Dragon Princesses, Snow Girls, Tentacle Monsters... and all sorts of other non-human creatures. She even wanted to cuddle with their dangerous enemies-the Magical Girls?! Most importantly, Lin Lu was forced to carry out Miss Witch's Last Wish List. Otherwise, he would die in twenty-four hours. To cuddle or to die? That is a question worth considering... Footnote: [1] Neko(猫娘): The Japanese word for "cat." In this context, it refers to a "Cat-girl" (Nekomusume)-a character with feline features like ears and a tail. [2]  Otaku(死宅): A term used to describe people with obsessive interests, particularly in anime, manga, and gaming culture.

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